I stand up straighter, shocked at h

I stand up straighter, shocked at his question. Especially because we’re standing right outside AJ’s door. I glance inside the car at AJ but his focus is on his toys and not at all on the two of us. When I look back at Trey, I think I’m angrier than he is.
“You can’t be mad at me for running into someone at a store, Trey. I don’t control who shops here.”
I try to move past him, but he grabs my arm and pushes me against the car with the weight of his chest against mine. He brings his hand up to the side of my head and lowers his mouth to my ear. My heart is beating erratically, because I have no idea what he’s about to do.
“Auburn,” he says, his voice a deep, threatening whisper. “He’s been inside your apartment. He’s been in your bedroom. He was in that stupid fucking tent with you. Now I need you to tell me if he’s ever been inside you.”
I’m shaking my head, doing whatever I can to calm him down, because AJ is just a foot away from us inside this car. He’s gripping my wrist with his right hand, waiting for me to give him a verbal response. I’ll say whatever I need to say to make sure he doesn’t lose his temper right now.
“No,” I whisper. “It wasn’t like that. I barely knew him.”
Trey pulls back a few inches and looks me in the eye. “Good,” he says. “Because the way he was watching you made me think otherwise.” He presses his lips against my forehead and relieves some of the pressure around my wrist. He smiles gently at me, but the smile has the opposite effect. It terrifies me that his temperament can switch as fast as it just did. He pulls me in for a hug and presses his face into my hair. He inhales and then exhales slowly.
“I’m sorry,” he whispers. “Let’s get out of here.”
He opens the passenger door for me and shuts it after I climb inside. I exhale, relieved the moment is over but knowing full well that his reaction is a huge red flag.
As if my attention is being summoned, my eyes fall to a car across the parking lot. Owen is standing next to it, staring in my direction. The look on his face makes it apparent that he witnessed everything that just happened. However, from across the parking lot it could have very well looked like a tender moment rather than what it actually was. Which could also explain the pained look on Owen’s face.
He opens his car door just as Trey opens his. I keep my eyes focused on Owen long enough to see him lift a hand to his heart and clench it in a fist. The words he spoke to me about how much he missed his mother and brother replay in my head. “Sometimes I miss them so much, it hurts me right here. It feels like someone is squeezing my heart with the strength of the entire goddamn world.”
Trey pulls out of the parking lot and right before Owen is out of my view, I inconspicuously lift my fist to my own chest. Our eyes remain locked until they can’t anymore.


The incident at the grocery store yesterday wasn’t mentioned again. Trey and AJ spent the entire evening at my house, and Trey acted as if nothing was amiss while he cooked AJ chocolate chip pancakes. In fact, if anything, Trey was in an extra-good mood. I don’t know if it was a front to make up for the anger he expressed in the parking lot or if he really does enjoy spending the time he does with the two of us.
His sudden good mood could have also been because he knew he wouldn’t see me for four days and he didn’t want to leave on bad terms. He left for a conference in San Antonio this morning, and I could tell when he told me good-bye last night that he was uneasy about leaving me. He repeatedly asked me about my schedule and what plans I have for the weekend. Lydia is taking AJ to Pasadena for their weekend visit with her family. If I didn’t have to work today, I would have gone with them.
But I didn’t go, and now here I am with an entire weekend ahead of me and absolutely nothing to do; I think that makes Trey nervous. He obviously has trust issues when it comes to Owen.
Rightfully so. After all, here I am, two hours after Trey has left the city of Dallas, and I’m standing in front of Owen’s studio. Every day that I walk by his studio, I inconspicuously slip a piece of paper in the slot. I’ve left over twenty confessions in the last few weeks. I know he’s flooded with confessions, so there’s no way he would know which ones were mine. But it makes me feel better to leave them. Most of the confessions are trivial things that have nothing to do with him. They usually have to do with AJ, and I never write them in such a way that Owen would be able to tell it was me. I’m sure he would never even guess that I leave them. But it feels like a form of therapy, anyway.
I look down at the confession I just wrote.

I think about you every time he kisses me.

I fold it in two and slip it through the slot, not thinking twice about it. Since that moment between us in the grocery store yesterday, I can still feel him. I want to hear his voice again. I want to see his smile again.

Hasil (Bahasa Indonesia) 1:

Saya berdiri tegak, terkejut pada pertanyaan. Terutama karena kita sedang berdiri tepat di luar AJ pintu. Saya sekilas di dalam mobil di AJ tetapi fokusnya adalah pada mainannya dan sama sekali tidak kami berdua. Ketika saya melihat kembali Trey, saya pikir saya marah daripada dia."Anda tidak bisa marah pada saya untuk menjalankan menjadi seseorang di sebuah toko, Trey. Aku tidak mengendalikan yang Toko di sini."Saya mencoba untuk bergerak melewati dia, tapi dia meraih lenganku dan mendorong saya terhadap mobil dengan berat dadanya terhadap saya. Dia membawa tangannya ke sisi kepalaku dan menurunkan mulut-Nya ke telingaku. Jantung saya berdetak tak menentu, karena saya tidak tahu apa yang dia telah sekitar untuk melakukan."Auburn," katanya, suaranya yang mendalam, mengancam berbisik. "Dia telah di dalam apartemen Anda. Dia telah di kamar tidur Anda. Dia berada di tenda sialan itu bodoh dengan Anda. Sekarang saya perlu Anda untuk memberitahu saya jika dia pernah di dalam dirimu."Aku menggelengkan kepala, melakukan apa pun yang saya bisa untuk menenangkan dia, karena AJ hanya satu kaki menjauh dari kami di dalam mobil ini. Ia mencengkeram pergelangan tangan saya dengan tangan kanan, menunggu saya untuk memberinya tanggapan verbal. Aku akan mengatakan apa pun yang saya harus katakan untuk memastikan dia tidak kehilangan kesabaran sekarang."Tidak," saya berbisik. "Itu tidak seperti itu. Aku nyaris tidak mengenalnya."Trey pulls back a few inches and looks me in the eye. “Good,” he says. “Because the way he was watching you made me think otherwise.” He presses his lips against my forehead and relieves some of the pressure around my wrist. He smiles gently at me, but the smile has the opposite effect. It terrifies me that his temperament can switch as fast as it just did. He pulls me in for a hug and presses his face into my hair. He inhales and then exhales slowly.“I’m sorry,” he whispers. “Let’s get out of here.”He opens the passenger door for me and shuts it after I climb inside. I exhale, relieved the moment is over but knowing full well that his reaction is a huge red flag.As if my attention is being summoned, my eyes fall to a car across the parking lot. Owen is standing next to it, staring in my direction. The look on his face makes it apparent that he witnessed everything that just happened. However, from across the parking lot it could have very well looked like a tender moment rather than what it actually was. Which could also explain the pained look on Owen’s face.He opens his car door just as Trey opens his. I keep my eyes focused on Owen long enough to see him lift a hand to his heart and clench it in a fist. The words he spoke to me about how much he missed his mother and brother replay in my head. “Sometimes I miss them so much, it hurts me right here. It feels like someone is squeezing my heart with the strength of the entire goddamn world.”Trey pulls out of the parking lot and right before Owen is out of my view, I inconspicuously lift my fist to my own chest. Our eyes remain locked until they can’t anymore.The incident at the grocery store yesterday wasn’t mentioned again. Trey and AJ spent the entire evening at my house, and Trey acted as if nothing was amiss while he cooked AJ chocolate chip pancakes. In fact, if anything, Trey was in an extra-good mood. I don’t know if it was a front to make up for the anger he expressed in the parking lot or if he really does enjoy spending the time he does with the two of us.His sudden good mood could have also been because he knew he wouldn’t see me for four days and he didn’t want to leave on bad terms. He left for a conference in San Antonio this morning, and I could tell when he told me good-bye last night that he was uneasy about leaving me. He repeatedly asked me about my schedule and what plans I have for the weekend. Lydia is taking AJ to Pasadena for their weekend visit with her family. If I didn’t have to work today, I would have gone with them.But I didn’t go, and now here I am with an entire weekend ahead of me and absolutely nothing to do; I think that makes Trey nervous. He obviously has trust issues when it comes to Owen.Rightfully so. After all, here I am, two hours after Trey has left the city of Dallas, and I’m standing in front of Owen’s studio. Every day that I walk by his studio, I inconspicuously slip a piece of paper in the slot. I’ve left over twenty confessions in the last few weeks. I know he’s flooded with confessions, so there’s no way he would know which ones were mine. But it makes me feel better to leave them. Most of the confessions are trivial things that have nothing to do with him. They usually have to do with AJ, and I never write them in such a way that Owen would be able to tell it was me. I’m sure he would never even guess that I leave them. But it feels like a form of therapy, anyway.I look down at the confession I just wrote.I think about you every time he kisses me.I fold it in two and slip it through the slot, not thinking twice about it. Since that moment between us in the grocery store yesterday, I can still feel him. I want to hear his voice again. I want to see his smile again.

Hasil (Bahasa Indonesia) 2:

Aku berdiri tegak, terkejut mendengar pertanyaan itu. Terutama karena kita sedang berdiri tepat di luar pintu AJ. Aku melirik dalam mobil di AJ tapi fokusnya adalah pada mainan dan tidak sama sekali pada kami berdua. Ketika saya melihat kembali Trey, aku pikir aku marah dari dia.
"Anda tidak bisa marah padaku untuk berlari ke seseorang di sebuah toko, Trey. Saya tidak mengontrol siapa toko di sini.
"Aku mencoba untuk bergerak melewatinya, tapi ia meraih lenganku dan mendorongku terhadap mobil dengan berat dadanya terhadap saya. Dia membawa tangannya ke sisi kepalaku dan menurunkan mulutnya ke telingaku. Jantungku berdebar tak menentu, karena saya tidak tahu apa yang dia lakukan.
"Auburn," katanya, suaranya yang mendalam, mengancam bisikan. "Dia berada di dalam apartemen Anda. Dia berada di kamar tidur Anda. Dia berada di bodoh sialan tenda dengan Anda. Sekarang saya perlu Anda memberitahu saya jika dia pernah di dalam Anda.
"Aku menggelengkan kepala, melakukan apa pun yang saya bisa untuk menenangkannya, karena AJ hanya kaki jauhnya dari kami dalam mobil ini. Dia mencengkeram pergelangan tangan saya dengan tangan kanannya, menunggu saya untuk memberinya respon verbal. Aku akan mengatakan apa pun yang saya perlu mengatakan untuk memastikan ia tidak kehilangan amarahnya sekarang.
"Tidak," bisikku. "Itu tidak seperti itu. Saya hampir tidak mengenalnya.
"Trey menarik kembali beberapa inci dan terlihat saya di mata. "Baik," katanya. "Karena cara ia menonton Anda membuat saya berpikir sebaliknya." Dia menekan bibirnya di kening saya dan mengurangi beberapa tekanan di sekitar pergelangan tangan saya. Dia tersenyum lembut padaku, tapi senyum memiliki efek sebaliknya. Ini menakutkanku bahwa temperamen dapat beralih secepat itu baru saja melakukannya. Dia menarik saya untuk memeluk dan menekan wajahnya ke rambut saya. Dia menghirup dan kemudian hembuskan perlahan.
"Maafkan aku," bisiknya. "Mari kita keluar dari sini."
Dia membuka pintu penumpang untuk saya dan menutup setelah saya naik dalam. Aku mengeluarkan napas, lega saat ini adalah lebih tapi mengetahui dengan baik bahwa reaksinya adalah bendera merah besar.
Seolah-olah perhatian saya sedang dipanggil, mata saya jatuh ke mobil di tempat parkir. Owen berdiri di samping itu, menatap ke arah saya. Raut wajahnya membuatnya jelas bahwa ia menyaksikan segala sesuatu yang baru saja terjadi. Namun, dari seluruh tempat parkir itu bisa sangat baik tampak seperti saat tender daripada apa yang sebenarnya. Yang juga bisa menjelaskan tampilan sedih di wajah Owen.
Dia membuka pintu mobilnya seperti Trey membuka nya. Saya menjaga mata saya terfokus pada Owen cukup lama untuk melihat dia mengangkat tangan untuk hatinya dan mengepalkan dalam tinju. Kata-kata yang berbicara kepada saya tentang betapa ia merindukan ibu dan saudaranya memutar ulang di kepala saya. "Kadang-kadang aku merindukan mereka begitu banyak, itu menyakitkan saya di sini. Rasanya seperti seseorang meremas hati saya dengan kekuatan seluruh dunia sialan.
"Trey menarik keluar dari tempat parkir dan tepat sebelum Owen keluar dari pandangan saya, saya menarik perhatian mengangkat kepalan saya untuk dada saya sendiri. Mata kami tetap terkunci sampai mereka tidak bisa lagi. Insiden di toko kemarin tidak disebutkan lagi. Trey dan AJ menghabiskan seluruh malam di rumah saya, dan Trey bertindak seolah-olah tidak ada yang salah ketika ia dimasak AJ chocolate chip pancake. Bahkan, jika ada, Trey adalah dalam suasana hati yang ekstra-baik. Saya tidak tahu apakah itu depan untuk menebus kemarahan ia menyatakan di tempat parkir atau jika dia benar-benar menikmati menghabiskan waktu yang dia lakukan dengan kami berdua. Suasana hati yang baik tiba-tiba Nya bisa juga telah karena dia tahu ia tidak akan melihat saya selama empat hari dan ia tidak ingin meninggalkan istilah buruk. Dia meninggalkan untuk sebuah konferensi di San Antonio pagi ini, dan aku tahu ketika dia bilang selamat tinggal semalam bahwa ia gelisah tentang meninggalkan aku. Dia berulang kali bertanya tentang jadwal saya dan apa rencana saya untuk akhir pekan. Lydia adalah mengambil AJ ke Pasadena untuk kunjungan akhir pekan mereka dengan keluarganya. Jika saya tidak harus bekerja hari ini, saya akan pergi dengan mereka. Tapi aku tidak pergi, dan sekarang di sini saya dengan seluruh akhir pekan depan saya dan benar-benar tidak ada hubungannya; Saya pikir yang membuat Trey saraf. Dia jelas memiliki masalah kepercayaan ketika datang ke Owen. Memang seharusnya begitu. Setelah semua, di sini saya, dua jam setelah Trey telah meninggalkan kota Dallas, dan aku berdiri di depan studio Owen. Setiap hari aku berjalan dengan studionya, saya menarik perhatian menyelipkan secarik kertas di slot. Aku sudah meninggalkan lebih dari dua puluh pengakuan dalam beberapa minggu terakhir. Aku tahu dia dibanjiri dengan pengakuan, jadi tidak ada cara dia akan tahu mana yang saya. Tapi itu membuat saya merasa lebih baik untuk meninggalkan mereka. Sebagian besar pengakuan adalah hal-hal sepele yang tidak ada hubungannya dengan dia. Mereka biasanya harus dilakukan dengan AJ, dan saya tidak pernah menulis mereka sedemikian rupa bahwa Owen akan mampu mengatakan itu padaku. Saya yakin dia tidak akan pernah bahkan menebak bahwa saya meninggalkan mereka. Tapi rasanya seperti bentuk terapi, pula. Saya melihat ke bawah pada pengakuan Aku hanya menulis. Saya berpikir tentang Anda setiap kali dia menciumku. Aku lipat dalam dua dan slip melalui slot, tidak berpikir dua kali tentang hal itu. Sejak saat itu di antara kami di toko kelontong kemarin, aku masih bisa merasakan dia. Aku ingin mendengar suaranya lagi. Saya ingin melihat senyumnya lagi.