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Confronting Confrontation can be a powerful way of challenging members totake an honest look at themselves. However, when handled poorly, confrontationalso has the potential of being detrimental both to the person being confrontedand to the group process. Many leaders shy away from confrontationbecause they fear its possible repercussions: blocking the group interaction,hurting someone, or becoming the target of retaliation. Confrontation can easilybe seen as an uncaring attack. Skilled group counselors confront behaviorinconsistencies in a way that gives the person ample opportunity to considerwhat is being said. Skillful confrontation specifi es the behavior or the discrepanciesbetween verbal and nonverbal messages that are being challenged sothat no labeling can possibly occur.As is true of most of these skills, confronting is a skill leaders need to learn inchallenging individual members and the group as a whole. For example, if thegroup seems to be low in energy and characterized by superfi cial discussions,the leader might challenge the members to assess what they see going on in theirgroup and determine whether they want to change what they notice about theirfunctioning as a group. (Confrontation is discussed in more detail in Chapters 5,11, 14, and 15.)Refl ecting Feelings Refl ecting feelings is the skill of responding to the essenceof what a person has communicated. The purpose is to let membersknow that they are being heard and understood. Although refl ection entailsmirroring certain feelings that the person has expressed, it is not merely abouncing-back process. Refl ection is dependent on attention, interest, understanding,and respect for the person. When refl ection is done well, it fostersfurther contact and involvement; feeling understood and achieving a clearergrasp of one’s feelings are very reinforcing and stimulate the person to seekgreater self-awareness. (This skill is explored in detail in Chapter 10.)Supporting Supporting means providing group members with encouragementand reinforcement, especially when they are disclosing personal information, exploringpainful feelings, or taking risks. A leader can provide support by beingfully present at the appropriate time. This full presence requires a combination of skills: listening actively to what is being said and what is being conveyed nonverbally,being psychologically present with the client, and responding in a way thatencourages the client to continue working and to move forward.The essence of this skill is in knowing when it will be facilitative and when itwill be counterproductive. Some group leaders make the mistake of being overlysupportive, or of supporting too soon. If leaders limit themselves to a style that isalmost exclusively supportive, they deprive the members of potentially valuablechallenges. Leaders who offer support too quickly when someone is exploringpainful material tend to defuse the intensity of the experience and pull groupmembers away from their feelings. (We return to this topic in Chapter 10.)Empathizing The core of the skill of empathy lies in the leader’s ability tosensitively grasp the subjective world of the participant and yet retain his orher own separateness. To empathize effectively, a leader needs to care for thegroup members. One form of empathizing is for leaders to demonstrate culturalempathy, which is the ability to assume the worldview of others (Comas-Diaz, 2011). A background that includes a wide range of experiences can helpthe leader identify with others. (Empathy, too, is discussed in more detail inChapter 10.)Facilitating Facilitating is aimed at enhancing the group experience and enablingthe members to reach their goals. Facilitation skills involve openingup clear and direct communication among the participants and helping themassume increasing responsibility for the direction of the group. Facilitating isa vital tool in the person-centered approach, and it will be explored in moredepth in Chapter 10.Initiating Good initiating skills on the leader’s part keep the group fromfl oundering. These skills include using catalysts to get members to focus onmeaningful work, knowing how to employ various techniques that promotedeeper self-exploration, and providing links for various themes being exploredin the group. Whereas appropriate leader direction can give the groupa focus and keep it moving, too much direction can lead to passivity on the partof members. Initiating is a key skill in structuring a group session and in workingwith the group as a whole.
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