When we arrive at the school, I spr

When we arrive at the school, I sprint inside. I'm out of breath and on the verge of hysteria when we find the office. Kel and Caulder are both sitting in the lobby.
 
My feet won’t move fast enough as I run to them and hug them.
 
"Are y'all okay? What happened?"
 
They both shrug.
 
"We don’t know," Kel says. "They just told us we had to sit here until our parents came."
 
"Ms. Cohen?" someone says from behind me. I turn around and there is a slender woman with red hair looking at me. She's wearing a black pencil skirt and a white dress shirt. She looks more like a librarian than a principal. She gestures her hand toward her office and Eddie and I follow her.
 
The woman walks into her office and takes a seat at her desk, nodding to the chairs in front of her. Eddie and I both sit.
 
"I'm Ms. Brill. I'm the principal here at Chapman Elementary. Principal Brill."
 
The curt way she's speaking to me and her hoity toity posture have immediately turned me off. I already don't like her.
 
"Are Caulder's parents joining us?" she asks.
 
"Caulder's parents are dead," I reply.
 
She gasps, then attempts to control her reaction by sitting up even straighter. "Oh, that's right. I'm sorry," she says. "Is it his brother? He lives with his brother, right?"
 
I nod. "He's in Detroit, he can't make it. I'm Kel's sister. What's the problem?"
 
She laughs. "Well, isn't it obvious?" She gestures out her office window to them.
 
I look at the boys. They're playing rock-paper-scissors and laughing. I know she's referring to their costumes, but she's already lost my respect with her attitude, so I continue to act oblivious.
 
"Is rock-paper-scissors against school policy?" I ask.
 
Eddie laughs.
 
"Ms. Cohen," Principal Brill says. "They're dressed as cancerous lungs!" She shakes her head in disbelief.
 
"I thought they were rotten kidney beans," Eddie says.
 
We both laugh.
 
"I don't think this is funny," Principal Brill says. "They're causing a distraction amongst the students! Those are very offensive and crude costumes! I don't know who thought it was a good idea, but you need to take them home and change their clothes."
 
My focus returns to Principal Brill as I slowly turn around and lean forward, placing my arms on her desk.
 
"Principal Brill," I say calmly. "Those costumes were made by my mother. My mother, who has stage four small-cell lung cancer. My mother, who will never watch her little boy celebrate another Halloween again. My mother, who will more than likely experience a year of 'lasts.' Last Christmas. Last birthday. Last Easter. And if God is willing, her last Mother's Day. My mother, who when asked by her nine-year-old son if he could be her cancer for Halloween, had no choice but to make him the best cancerous tumor-ridden lung costume she could. So if you think it's so offensive, I suggest you drive them home yourself and tell my mother to her face. Do you need my address?"
 
Principal Brill's mouth is gaped open as she shakes her head. She can't respond. I stand up and Eddie follows me out the door. I stop short and spin around and walk back into her office.
 
"And one more thing. The costume contest? I hope it's fairly judged."
 
Eddie laughs as I shut the door behind us.
 
"What's going on?" Kel asks.
 
"Nothing," I say. "Y'all can go back to class. She just wanted to know where we got the materials for your costume so she can be a hemorrhoid next year."
 
Eddie and I try to contain our laughter as the boys make their way back to class. We head outside and as soon as we open the doors, we explode. We laugh so hard, we cry.
 
When we get back in the jeep, I have six missed calls from my mother and two from Will. I return their calls and assure them the situation has been resolved without sparing any details.
 
Later that afternoon when I pick the boys up from school, they sprint to the car.
 
"We won!" Caulder yells as he climbs in the backseat. "We both won! Fifty dollars each!