Heart pounding, I stared up into hi

Heart pounding, I stared up into his eyes. “Our first time?” I repeated dumbly, as if it just occurred to me that we hadn’t done the deed yet.
“I want you to only be thinking about me. I want you to focused on me because you want to be and not because you are trying to escape something,” he said, and slowly loosened his grip. “I don’t want what will happen between us to ever be overshadowed by something else.”
I was aching in so many ways, but his words slowly filtered through the haze. He watched me as it all clicked together. What was I thinking? My face started to crumble. “I’m—­”
“Don’t apologize, baby.” He dropped a sweet, quick kiss on my forehead and then eased on his side. “Not allowing this is the fucking hardest thing I’ve ever done.”
I willed myself to pull it together, but my eyes stung and then filled with tears. When they spilled over, it didn’t have anything to do with Jase putting the brakes on my little sexual escapades. I was feeling what I needed to feel right then and there—­sorrow, pain, confusion, and hurt. It all whirled together, forming a maelstrom of violent emotion.
Jase swept his arms around me, pulling me to his chest, his hand cradling the back of my head. He seemed to know why the tears came, and he held me to him until I tired myself out and slipped into the sweet oblivion that was nothingness.
We had to have slept for hours, maybe even sleeping half of the day away, because when I opened my eyes, faint sunlight streamed in from the window behind the bed.
And we weren’t alone.
What the . . . ?
The cobwebs of sleep cluttered my head as the rest of the room came into view. My brother stood at the foot of the bed, his mouth hanging open. The top of Avery’s red head appeared, and her wide brown eyes peeked over his shoulder. I blinked slowly. What were they doing here? Was I dreaming? Or having a nightmare?
A muscle popped in Cam’s jaw as his gaze moved down the bed. I looked down and my eyes widened. The comforter had been tangled around our legs in the middle of the night. My left leg was outside the blanket and was snuggly fit between Jase’s thighs. While I knew he had his boxers on, it didn’t look that way. Hell, we looked naked. My borrowed shirt had slipped completely off my shoulder and with the way I’d hogged all the blankets, it didn’t look like I was wearing anything and Jase’s chest was exposed.
Worse yet, I was half on top of Jase.
Holy shit.
I stiffened, my gaze meeting Cam’s. His blue eyes were on fire as he snapped his mouth shut. Avery popped out from behind my brother, looking like she was fighting a grin as she clamped her hands under her chin.
Jase’s arm flexed around my waist, tugging me closer. He turned his head, nuzzling my neck. He yawned, a deep rousing sound that echoed through the room. “What’s wrong, baby?”
I was speechless.
Every line in my brother’s body tensed in a way that spelled big, mothertrucker kind of trouble. “Baby?”
Jase stilled, but he didn’t remove his arm as he pulled his face out of my neck. He looked toward the foot of the bed and exhaled slowly. There was a beat of silence and then Cam said, "What the fuck?

Hasil (Bahasa Indonesia) 1:

Jantung berdebar, aku menatap ke matanya. "Pertama kali kami?" Aku mengulang dumbly, seolah-olah itu saja terjadi kepada saya bahwa kita tidak melakukan perbuatan belum."Saya ingin Anda hanya berpikir tentang saya. Saya ingin Anda untuk berfokus pada saya karena Anda ingin menjadi dan bukan karena Anda mencoba melarikan diri sesuatu,"katanya, dan perlahan-lahan mengendurkan pegangan. "Saya tidak ingin apa yang akan terjadi antara kita pernah dibayangi oleh sesuatu yang lain."Nyeri dalam banyak cara, tapi kata-katanya perlahan-lahan disaring melalui kabut. Dia melihat saya sebagai itu semua diklik bersama-sama. Apa yang kupikirkan? Wajah saya mulai runtuh. "Aku""Jangan Minta Maaf, bayi." Dia menjatuhkan ciuman manis, cepat di dahi saya dan kemudian mereda pada sisinya. "Tidak mengizinkan ini adalah hal yang paling sulit sialan pernah saya lakukan."Kuharap diri untuk menarik bersama-sama, tetapi mata saya tersengat dan kemudian diisi dengan air mata. Ketika mereka tumpah, tidak ada hubungannya dengan Jase menempatkan rem pada petualangan seksual saya sedikit. Saya merasa apa yang saya butuhkan untuk merasa seperti itu juga — kesedihan, rasa sakit, kekeliruan, dan sakit. Itu semua berputar bersama-sama, membentuk pusaran kekerasan emosi.Jase menyapu lengannya di sekitar saya, menarik saya ke dada, tangannya menggendong belakang kepalaku. Ia tampaknya tahu mengapa air mata datang, dan ia memegang saya kepadanya sampai aku lelah diriku dan menyelinap ke manis terlupakan itu ketiadaan.Kita harus memiliki tidur untuk jam, bahkan mungkin tidur setengah hari, karena ketika saya membuka mataku, sinar matahari samar mengalir di dari jendela di belakang tempat tidur.And we weren’t alone.What the . . . ?The cobwebs of sleep cluttered my head as the rest of the room came into view. My brother stood at the foot of the bed, his mouth hanging open. The top of Avery’s red head appeared, and her wide brown eyes peeked over his shoulder. I blinked slowly. What were they doing here? Was I dreaming? Or having a nightmare?A muscle popped in Cam’s jaw as his gaze moved down the bed. I looked down and my eyes widened. The comforter had been tangled around our legs in the middle of the night. My left leg was outside the blanket and was snuggly fit between Jase’s thighs. While I knew he had his boxers on, it didn’t look that way. Hell, we looked naked. My borrowed shirt had slipped completely off my shoulder and with the way I’d hogged all the blankets, it didn’t look like I was wearing anything and Jase’s chest was exposed.Worse yet, I was half on top of Jase.Holy shit.I stiffened, my gaze meeting Cam’s. His blue eyes were on fire as he snapped his mouth shut. Avery popped out from behind my brother, looking like she was fighting a grin as she clamped her hands under her chin.Jase’s arm flexed around my waist, tugging me closer. He turned his head, nuzzling my neck. He yawned, a deep rousing sound that echoed through the room. “What’s wrong, baby?”I was speechless.Every line in my brother’s body tensed in a way that spelled big, mothertrucker kind of trouble. “Baby?”Jase stilled, but he didn’t remove his arm as he pulled his face out of my neck. He looked toward the foot of the bed and exhaled slowly. There was a beat of silence and then Cam said, "What the fuck?