The engine of my jeep purrs its' fa

The engine of my jeep purrs its' familiar sound when I crank it, and that pisses me off too. I slam my fist against the steering wheel, wishing so many things. I wish I never would have met Will the first week I was here. It would have been so much easier if I'd have met him in class first. Or better yet, I wish we never would have even moved to Ypsilanti. I wish my dad were alive. I wish my mother wasn't being so vague about her errands. I wish Caulder wasn't at our house every day. Seeing him just makes me think of Will. I wish Will would never have fixed my jeep. I hate that he does considerate things like that. It would make it so much easier to hate him if he really was all those things I called him. Oh my god, I can't believe I called him all those names. Wait, no regrets.
 
***
 
I pick the boys up from school and drive home. I beat Will home today, but I won’t be waiting at the window. I’m done waiting at the window.
 
"We'll be at Caulder's," Kel yells as they slam the jeep door.
 
Good.
 
When I walk inside, I hear my mother talking to someone in her bedroom. I pause outside her door. It's a one-sided conversation so she must be on the phone. Normally, I would never eavesdrop on one of her conversations. However, her behavior lately warrants a little nosiness. Or maybe my behavior warrants a little rebellion. Either way, I cup my ear to the door.
 
"I know. I know. I'll tell them soon," she whispers.
 
"No, I think it will go over better if I tell them alone…"
 
"Of course I will. I love you too, Babe."
 
She's signing off. I quietly tiptoe to my bedroom and slip inside. I shut the door behind me and slide to the floor.
 
Seven months now. It took her all of seven months to move on. She can't be seeing someone else already, but her words on the phone couldn't have been more clear. I'm in stage one again: Denial.
 
How could she? And whoever he is, he already wants her to introduce us to him? I already don't like him. And her nerve! How could she accost Will like she did, when what she's doing is just as deplorable, if not worse? Stage one is extremely brief. I'm back in stage two again: Anger.
 
I decide not to bring it up right away. I want to find out more before I confront her about it. I want the upper hand in this situation, and it's going to take some thought.
 
"Lake? Are you back?" She's knocking on my door. I have to roll forward and hop up to get out of the way when she opens it. She sees me stand and her eyebrows raise as she watches me jump up.
 
"What are you doing?" she asks.
 
"Stretching. My back hurts."
 
She doesn't buy it, so I clasp my hands behind me and stretch my arms upward, bending forward.
 
"Take some aspirin," she says.
 
"Okay."
 
"I'm off tonight, but I have a lot of sleep to catch up on. I didn't get any at all today so I'm going to lie down. Can you make sure Kel gets a bath before he goes to bed tonight?"
 
"Sure."
 
We both start down the hallway. "Wait, Mom?"
 
She turns back to me, her lids dragging over her bloodshot eyes.
 
"I'm going out Thursday night. Is that okay?"
 
She eyes me suspiciously. "With who?"
 
"Eddie, Gavin and Nick."
 
"Three guys? You aren't going anywhere with three guys."
 
"No. Eddie's a girl. She's my friend. Her boyfriend is Gavin and we’re double dating. I'm going with Nick."
 
Her eyes brighten a little. "Oh. Well, good." She smiles as she opens the door to her bedroom. "Wait," she says. "I work Thursday. What about Kel?"
 
"Will has a sitter on Thursdays. He already said Kel could stay there."
 
She looks pleased, but only for a second. "Will agreed to pay a sitter? To watch Kel? So you could go on a date?"
 
Crap. I didn't realize how this would look. "Mom, it's been weeks. We went on one date, we're over it."
 
She eyes me curiously. "Hmm." She returns to her room, still unappeased.
 
Her suspicion brings me a small sense of gratification. She thinks I'm lying about something. Now we're even.

Hasil (Bahasa Indonesia) 1:

Mesin mendengkur jip saya yang ' akrab suara ketika saya engkol itu, dan itu membuatku kesal juga. Aku membanting saya tinju terhadap kemudi, berharap begitu banyak hal. Saya berharap saya tidak pernah akan temui akan minggu pertama aku ada di sini. Itu akan menjadi jauh lebih mudah jika saya akan telah bertemu dengannya di kelas pertama. Atau lebih baik lagi, aku berharap kita tidak pernah akan telah bahkan pindah ke Ypsilanti. Saya berharap ayah saya hidup. Saya berharap ibuku tidak yang begitu jelas mengenai tugas nya. Saya berharap Caulder tidak di rumah kami setiap hari. Melihat dia hanya membuat saya berpikir akan. Saya berharap akan pernah memiliki tetap jip saya. Aku benci dia tidak mempertimbangkan hal-hal seperti itu. Itu akan membuatnya jauh lebih mudah untuk membencinya jika ia benar-benar semua hal-hal aku memanggilnya. Oh Tuhan, aku tidak percaya aku memanggilnya nama-nama. Tunggu, tidak menyesal. *** Aku mengambil anak-anak dari sekolah dan pulang. Aku mengalahkan akan rumah hari ini, tapi aku tidak akan menunggu di jendela. Aku sudah selesai menunggu di jendela. "Kami akan di Caulder's," Kel berteriak karena mereka membanting pintu jip. Bagus. Saat aku berjalan di dalam, aku mendengar ibu saya berbicara dengan seseorang di kamar tidur. Saya berhenti sejenak di luar pintu. Ini adalah percakapan sepihak sehingga dia harus di telepon. Biasanya, saya akan pernah menguping salah satu percakapan. Namun, perilakunya akhir-akhir ini menjamin sedikit nosiness. Atau mungkin perilaku saya Waran pemberontakan kecil. Bagaimanapun, saya cangkir telinga saya ke pintu. "Aku tahu. Saya tahu. Saya akan memberitahu mereka segera,"ia berbisik. "Tidak, saya pikir itu akan pergi lebih baik jika saya kirim mereka sendiri..." "Tentu saja aku akan. I love you terlalu, sayang. " Dia adalah sign. Aku diam-diam berjinjit untuk kamar tidur dan slip di dalam saya. Aku menutup pintu di belakang saya dan geser ke lantai. Tujuh bulan sekarang. Butuh semua tujuh bulan untuk melanjutkan. Dia tidak bisa melihat orang lain sudah, tapi kata-katanya di telepon tidak mungkin lebih jelas. Aku sedang dalam tahap satu lagi: penyangkalan. Bagaimana mungkin dia? Dan siapa pun, sudah ingin dia memperkenalkan kita kepada-Nya? Aku sudah tidak suka kepadanya. Dan saraf nya! Bagaimana bisa dia menyapa akan seperti yang dia lakukan, ketika apa yang dia lakukan hanya sebagai menyedihkan, jika tidak lebih buruk? Tahap satu sangat singkat. Aku kembali di Stadium dua lagi: kemarahan. Saya memutuskan untuk tidak membawanya ke atas segera. Saya ingin mengetahui lebih lanjut sebelum saya menghadapi dia tentang hal itu. Saya ingin tangan atas dalam situasi ini, dan itu akan mengambil beberapa pemikiran. "Lake? Apakah Anda kembali?" Dia mengetuk pintu. Aku harus roll ke depan dan melompat untuk mendapatkan keluar dari jalan ketika ia membuka itu. Dia melihat saya berdiri dan menaikkan alis sebagai Dia watches saya melompat. "Apa yang Anda lakukan?" Dia meminta. "Peregangan. Punggung saya sakit." Dia tidak membelinya, jadi saya genggam tangan di belakang saya dan meregangkan tangan saya ke atas, membungkuk ke depan. "Mengambil aspirin," katanya. "Oke." "Aku berangkat malam ini, tapi aku punya banyak tidur untuk mengejar. Aku tidak mendapatkan apapun sama sekali hari jadi aku akan berbaring. Anda bisa memastikan bahwa Kel membuat mandi sebelum dia pergi ke tempat tidur malam ini?" "Sure." We both start down the hallway. "Wait, Mom?" She turns back to me, her lids dragging over her bloodshot eyes. "I'm going out Thursday night. Is that okay?" She eyes me suspiciously. "With who?" "Eddie, Gavin and Nick." "Three guys? You aren't going anywhere with three guys." "No. Eddie's a girl. She's my friend. Her boyfriend is Gavin and we’re double dating. I'm going with Nick." Her eyes brighten a little. "Oh. Well, good." She smiles as she opens the door to her bedroom. "Wait," she says. "I work Thursday. What about Kel?" "Will has a sitter on Thursdays. He already said Kel could stay there." She looks pleased, but only for a second. "Will agreed to pay a sitter? To watch Kel? So you could go on a date?" Crap. I didn't realize how this would look. "Mom, it's been weeks. We went on one date, we're over it." She eyes me curiously. "Hmm." She returns to her room, still unappeased. Her suspicion brings me a small sense of gratification. She thinks I'm lying about something. Now we're even.