“Are we going to talk about this?”

“Are we going to talk about this?” my mother asked moments after Jude had left my room.
She paced several steps toward the bathroom and then pivoted back, retracing her steps, only to do the same thing all over again. She looked a bit agitated.
“Talk about what?” I asked, sinking further into my blankets. A chill traveled up my spine, and I buried my hands under the sheets, trying to cover as much skin as possible.
“Why haven’t you told me about your secret visitor?”
“Jude isn’t a secret. I wasn’t trying to hide anything from you. You were just never here when he visited.”
“And you never thought to tell me that you were…befriending a man who worked in the hospital?”
She’d said the word befriend as if it were dripping in gasoline and would likely light on fire at any given moment. It pissed me off, and it was a problem that needed to be taken care of quickly.
“Listen, Mom, I wasn’t trying to deceive you. Jude has been a friend to me. He’s kept me company on lonely nights.”
Her eyebrows rose.
I quickly pulled my hand out from under the blankets and lifted it to silence her rebuttal. “I know what you’re going to say. He was a friend. That’s it. I know you think because I’ve been in this bed and behind these walls for the majority of my life that I am innocent about the ways of the world, and to some extent, you’re probably right but not about this. Friends, I swear.”
She made a garbled humph sound in her throat and pulled her arms to her chest. “And now? That parting display of affection I saw on his way out? That wasn’t how you say good-bye to a friend, Lailah. I might be a little out of practice, but I do remember that.”
That stung a little. I knew she didn’t mean it to be harsh. My mother was direct, demanding, and straightforward, but she was never vicious or vindictive. Her personality came from necessity. I didn’t know much about her past, but I knew she’d been abandoned by the one person she thought she could trust—my father. I didn’t think she’d ever gotten over it. Since then, she’d fought for everything in life, and I knew my illness had only made that ten times harder. She’d spent her life caring for me, so she could never fit in a love life.
“And now, we’re more,” I simply answered, not knowing exactly what to call Jude and me.
The word boyfriend did sound nice, but he hadn’t said it, and I certainly wasn’t going to go around calling him that without audible proof from him. Friends with benefits just sounded dirty, and we definitely weren’t there yet. Flashes of his lips on mine while his hand had moved up the back of my shirt danced around in my head, and I felt my cheeks redden. While I was hoping for more than friends, I was looking forward to the benefits part.
My mother shook her head in frustration before leaving the room. I was sure she was going to find Dr. Marcus to have another one of her secret meetings that I wouldn’t be privy to. We wouldn’t want to talk about my own health in front of me.
I let the annoyance melt away, and I snuggled back down in my bed, allowing my thoughts to drift back to Jude. Whatever our label was—friends or something else—I wanted it to continue even though I knew that I shouldn’t. I was selfish for not pushing him away. My life was at a crossroads. Who knew which path I would end up traveling on? Was it fair to ask him to walk either of those roads with me? Even if I were lucky enough to get a transplant, there would be no guarantees it would be successful.
But were there ever any guarantees in life?
I’d told Jude that I believed a normal life was about the good and the bad. The ups and downs, not knowing where our lives would eventually end up—that’s what made us human.
Isn’t that what I want—a normal life with no guarantees?
If I’ve been living from one bad moment to the next with very little good in the middle, couldn’t I just take Jude as my wild card? Couldn’t he be my savior from all the bad I’ve had to endure?
But a normal relationship was about give and take.
If Jude were my replacement for all the bad in my life, could I be his?
But what if I were the opposite?
 

 
That one single question kept repeating through my thoughts as I tried to catch a few quiet moments of rest before my mom returned. I tossed all the blankets off of me and then promptly tugged them back around me several minutes later when I became ice cold. When I gave up on the notion of sleep, I instead pulled out my laptop and entered the one name doing laps in my head.
Thousands of search results popped up on Google. Many weren’t specifically related to Jude but rather the family as a whole. I found financial reports and glamorous photos of who I assumed were his parents at charity events and other elite social gatherings. I scrolled down further and found an old article entitled “The Cavanaughs Find Gold Mine in Youngest Son.”
Looking around the room, I felt like I was betraying some sort of secret trust between Jude and me. Why do I feel the need to do this? Shouldn’t I just ask him?
But my finger pushed down on the touchpad, and I pulled up the article.
I scanned the text, pulling out the bits of information I found relevant, and my mind skidded to a halt about a third of the way down after the introduction where the journalist had written about the vast accolades and accomplishments of the Cavanaugh family.
Jude was smart, like really freaking smart.
He’d also been groomed from nearly infancy to take over the family business.
According to this article, after showing a love for math at an early age, his parents had sent him to the best schools money could buy. From the time he was in kindergarten, he was privately tutored. The journalist commented that the money had been wasted because all the tutors in the world couldn’t teach Jude the one thing he’d possessed since birth—instinct. From the age of thirteen, rather than partaking in after-school activities, Jude had helped his father make major business decisions.
A knock at my door startled me from my reading, and I quickly slammed my laptop shut in shame.
Grace breezed through my door like a breath of fresh air in autumn. “Good morning, sweets. Heard you had a rough evening. You’re not trying to leave me again, are you?” she asked with a wink.
“Ugh, not anymore.”
The mask over her face hid her smile from me, but I could see the crinkles around her eyes, so I knew it was there, buried under that ugly disposable covering.
“Well, no matter. We’ll get you out of here soon enough.”
Unlike times in the past, I wasn’t as eager to get home. I still wanted to, especially knowing I’d still see Jude, but when I was here, I could see him practically every day. Would that be the case outside the confines of the hospital? Or would it be different?
I had so many unanswered questions.
“Hey, Grace. Do you know anything about the Cavanaugh family?” I blurted out.
“Like, the Cavanaugh family?” She moved around the room as she began checking my vitals and replacing my fluids.
“Yeah, I was, um…watching the news the other day and something about them popped up,” I lied. It was a white lie, so it didn’t count.
“Well, if they weren’t in a movie or on a TV show, I don’t pay much attention, but I do know a few things about the son.”
My heart sped up, but I tried not to appear the slightest bit affected. “Oh?” I asked.
“Yeah, he’s gorgeous—not as gorgeous as my Brian, of course.” She took a seat on the edge of my bed next to my feet to finish our chat.
“I thought he hasn’t been seen in a long time,” I offered.
“Oh, not him. I’m talking about Roman Cavanaugh, the oldest one. He’s been in the gossip magazines since he was in high school. He’s one of those men who are hard to tame. Everyone always wants to know whom he is dating or where he was last seen. He’s like the George Clooney of the business world.”
“And the other brother?” I asked, adjusting my blankets so that I didn’t have to look her in the eye.
“Oh, right. What’s his name? Jude! Oh, hey, like our Jude. They do kind of look alike, except ours has all the tattoos and muscles. I don’t know honestly. He really never became much of a public figure. It’s always been Roman. The press speculated that Jude became extremely introverted after his fiancée died.”
Fiancée?
Died?
“Really?” I croaked out.
“Yeah, the family didn’t release many details until months after the fact. No one even knew he was engaged. Of course, the only Cavanaugh anyone ever paid attention to was Roman,” she said with dreamy eyes and a shrug.
Jude was engaged? And he lost her?
I felt pain and sadness for him. All of it boiled up like an inferno until I felt dizzy from it.
My heart began an erratic rhythm that had nothing to do with my sudden education of Jude’s past.
Grace rose from her spot at the end of my bed and resumed her routine. She turned her back to me as she disconnected the empty fluid bag from the IV stand. “Speaking of Judes, what’s going on with you and our Jude? I heard he caused quite a commotion around here last night.”
The room started to spin, and beads of sweat trickled down my forehead while I tried to vocalize an answer. All that came out was a bunch of useless syllables. Grace’s head sharply whipped around, and I saw her surprised expression through the haze of movements before she reached out to grab my call button.
I heard her shout the words, "Code Blue," right before I passed out.

Hasil (Bahasa Indonesia) 1:

"Apakah kita akan berbicara tentang hal ini?" ibuku meminta beberapa saat setelah Yudas telah meninggalkan kamarku.Dia berjalan beberapa langkah ke arah kamar mandi dan kemudian diputar kembali, retracing langkah-langkah, hanya untuk melakukan hal yang sama. Dia tampak sedikit gelisah."Bicara tentang apa?" Saya bertanya, tenggelam jauh ke selimut saya. Dingin bepergian tulang belakang saya, dan saya dikuburkan tanganku di bawah selimut, berusaha untuk menutupi kulit sebanyak mungkin."Mengapa belum Anda bercerita tentang pengunjung Anda rahasia?""Yudas bukan rahasia. Saya tidak mencoba untuk menyembunyikan sesuatu dari Anda. Kau tak pernah di sini ketika dia mengunjungi.""Dan Anda tidak pernah berpikir untuk memberitahu saya bahwa Anda tidak... berteman dengan seorang pria yang bekerja di rumah sakit?"Dia berkata kata berteman seolah-olah itu adalah menetes dalam bensin dan akan kemungkinan cahaya terbakar pada saat tertentu. Itu marah aku, dan itu adalah masalah yang perlu diambil dari perawatan dengan cepat."Mendengarkan, Mom, aku tidak mencoba untuk menipu Anda. Yudas telah menjadi teman saya. Dia telah membuatku perusahaan pada kesepian malam."Alis naik.Aku segera ditarik tangan saya keluar dari bawah selimut dan mengangkatnya untuk membungkam bantahan nya. "Aku tahu apa yang akan Anda katakan. Dia adalah teman. Thats it. Saya tahu Anda berpikir karena aku sudah berada di tempat tidur ini dan di balik dinding-dinding ini untuk sebagian besar hidup saya bahwa saya tidak bersalah tentang cara dunia, dan sampai batas tertentu, kau mungkin benar, tetapi tidak tentang hal ini. Teman-teman, saya bersumpah."She made a garbled humph sound in her throat and pulled her arms to her chest. “And now? That parting display of affection I saw on his way out? That wasn’t how you say good-bye to a friend, Lailah. I might be a little out of practice, but I do remember that.”That stung a little. I knew she didn’t mean it to be harsh. My mother was direct, demanding, and straightforward, but she was never vicious or vindictive. Her personality came from necessity. I didn’t know much about her past, but I knew she’d been abandoned by the one person she thought she could trust—my father. I didn’t think she’d ever gotten over it. Since then, she’d fought for everything in life, and I knew my illness had only made that ten times harder. She’d spent her life caring for me, so she could never fit in a love life.“And now, we’re more,” I simply answered, not knowing exactly what to call Jude and me.The word boyfriend did sound nice, but he hadn’t said it, and I certainly wasn’t going to go around calling him that without audible proof from him. Friends with benefits just sounded dirty, and we definitely weren’t there yet. Flashes of his lips on mine while his hand had moved up the back of my shirt danced around in my head, and I felt my cheeks redden. While I was hoping for more than friends, I was looking forward to the benefits part.My mother shook her head in frustration before leaving the room. I was sure she was going to find Dr. Marcus to have another one of her secret meetings that I wouldn’t be privy to. We wouldn’t want to talk about my own health in front of me.I let the annoyance melt away, and I snuggled back down in my bed, allowing my thoughts to drift back to Jude. Whatever our label was—friends or something else—I wanted it to continue even though I knew that I shouldn’t. I was selfish for not pushing him away. My life was at a crossroads. Who knew which path I would end up traveling on? Was it fair to ask him to walk either of those roads with me? Even if I were lucky enough to get a transplant, there would be no guarantees it would be successful.But were there ever any guarantees in life?I’d told Jude that I believed a normal life was about the good and the bad. The ups and downs, not knowing where our lives would eventually end up—that’s what made us human.Isn’t that what I want—a normal life with no guarantees?If I’ve been living from one bad moment to the next with very little good in the middle, couldn’t I just take Jude as my wild card? Couldn’t he be my savior from all the bad I’ve had to endure?But a normal relationship was about give and take.If Jude were my replacement for all the bad in my life, could I be his?But what if I were the opposite?  That one single question kept repeating through my thoughts as I tried to catch a few quiet moments of rest before my mom returned. I tossed all the blankets off of me and then promptly tugged them back around me several minutes later when I became ice cold. When I gave up on the notion of sleep, I instead pulled out my laptop and entered the one name doing laps in my head.Thousands of search results popped up on Google. Many weren’t specifically related to Jude but rather the family as a whole. I found financial reports and glamorous photos of who I assumed were his parents at charity events and other elite social gatherings. I scrolled down further and found an old article entitled “The Cavanaughs Find Gold Mine in Youngest Son.”Looking around the room, I felt like I was betraying some sort of secret trust between Jude and me. Why do I feel the need to do this? Shouldn’t I just ask him?But my finger pushed down on the touchpad, and I pulled up the article.I scanned the text, pulling out the bits of information I found relevant, and my mind skidded to a halt about a third of the way down after the introduction where the journalist had written about the vast accolades and accomplishments of the Cavanaugh family.Jude was smart, like really freaking smart.He’d also been groomed from nearly infancy to take over the family business.According to this article, after showing a love for math at an early age, his parents had sent him to the best schools money could buy. From the time he was in kindergarten, he was privately tutored. The journalist commented that the money had been wasted because all the tutors in the world couldn’t teach Jude the one thing he’d possessed since birth—instinct. From the age of thirteen, rather than partaking in after-school activities, Jude had helped his father make major business decisions.A knock at my door startled me from my reading, and I quickly slammed my laptop shut in shame.
Grace breezed through my door like a breath of fresh air in autumn. “Good morning, sweets. Heard you had a rough evening. You’re not trying to leave me again, are you?” she asked with a wink.
“Ugh, not anymore.”
The mask over her face hid her smile from me, but I could see the crinkles around her eyes, so I knew it was there, buried under that ugly disposable covering.
“Well, no matter. We’ll get you out of here soon enough.”
Unlike times in the past, I wasn’t as eager to get home. I still wanted to, especially knowing I’d still see Jude, but when I was here, I could see him practically every day. Would that be the case outside the confines of the hospital? Or would it be different?
I had so many unanswered questions.
“Hey, Grace. Do you know anything about the Cavanaugh family?” I blurted out.
“Like, the Cavanaugh family?” She moved around the room as she began checking my vitals and replacing my fluids.
“Yeah, I was, um…watching the news the other day and something about them popped up,” I lied. It was a white lie, so it didn’t count.
“Well, if they weren’t in a movie or on a TV show, I don’t pay much attention, but I do know a few things about the son.”
My heart sped up, but I tried not to appear the slightest bit affected. “Oh?” I asked.
“Yeah, he’s gorgeous—not as gorgeous as my Brian, of course.” She took a seat on the edge of my bed next to my feet to finish our chat.
“I thought he hasn’t been seen in a long time,” I offered.
“Oh, not him. I’m talking about Roman Cavanaugh, the oldest one. He’s been in the gossip magazines since he was in high school. He’s one of those men who are hard to tame. Everyone always wants to know whom he is dating or where he was last seen. He’s like the George Clooney of the business world.”
“And the other brother?” I asked, adjusting my blankets so that I didn’t have to look her in the eye.
“Oh, right. What’s his name? Jude! Oh, hey, like our Jude. They do kind of look alike, except ours has all the tattoos and muscles. I don’t know honestly. He really never became much of a public figure. It’s always been Roman. The press speculated that Jude became extremely introverted after his fiancée died.”
Fiancée?
Died?
“Really?” I croaked out.
“Yeah, the family didn’t release many details until months after the fact. No one even knew he was engaged. Of course, the only Cavanaugh anyone ever paid attention to was Roman,” she said with dreamy eyes and a shrug.
Jude was engaged? And he lost her?
I felt pain and sadness for him. All of it boiled up like an inferno until I felt dizzy from it.
My heart began an erratic rhythm that had nothing to do with my sudden education of Jude’s past.
Grace rose from her spot at the end of my bed and resumed her routine. She turned her back to me as she disconnected the empty fluid bag from the IV stand. “Speaking of Judes, what’s going on with you and our Jude? I heard he caused quite a commotion around here last night.”
The room started to spin, and beads of sweat trickled down my forehead while I tried to vocalize an answer. All that came out was a bunch of useless syllables. Grace’s head sharply whipped around, and I saw her surprised expression through the haze of movements before she reached out to grab my call button.
I heard her shout the words, "Code Blue," right before I passed out.

Hasil (Bahasa Indonesia) 2:

"Apakah kita akan berbicara tentang hal ini?" Tanya ibuku saat setelah Jude telah meninggalkan kamar saya.
Dia mondar-mandir beberapa langkah menuju kamar mandi dan kemudian berputar kembali, menapak langkah nya, hanya untuk melakukan hal yang sama lagi. Dia tampak sedikit gelisah.
"Bicara tentang apa?" Tanya saya, tenggelam lebih jauh ke dalam selimut saya. Rasa dingin melakukan perjalanan tulang belakang saya, dan saya terkubur tangan saya di bawah selimut, berusaha menutupi sebanyak kulit mungkin.
"Kenapa kau tidak bercerita tentang pengunjung rahasia Anda?"
"Jude bukan rahasia. Aku tidak berusaha untuk menyembunyikan apa pun dari Anda. Anda hanya pernah di sini ketika ia mengunjungi.
"" Dan Anda tidak pernah berpikir untuk memberitahu saya bahwa Anda sedang ... berteman seorang pria yang bekerja di rumah sakit?
"Dia mengatakan kata berteman seolah-olah itu menetes dalam bensin dan kemungkinan akan menyala terbakar pada saat tertentu. Ini membuatku marah, dan itu adalah masalah yang perlu ditangani dengan cepat.
"Dengar, Bu, saya tidak mencoba untuk menipu Anda. Jude telah teman untuk saya. Dia membuat saya perusahaan pada malam yang sepi.
"Alisnya naik.
Aku cepat-cepat menarik tangan saya keluar dari bawah selimut dan mengangkatnya untuk membungkam bantahan nya. "Aku tahu apa yang akan Anda katakan. Dia adalah teman. Itu dia. Aku tahu kau pikir karena aku sudah berada di tempat tidur dan di balik tembok ini untuk sebagian besar hidup saya bahwa saya tidak bersalah tentang cara-cara dunia, dan sampai batas tertentu, Anda mungkin benar tetapi tidak tentang hal ini. Teman-teman, aku bersumpah. "Dia membuat suara humph kacau di tenggorokan dan menarik tangannya ke dadanya.
"Dan sekarang? Bahwa tampilan perpisahan kasih sayang saya melihat di jalan keluar? Itu bukan bagaimana Anda mengucapkan selamat tinggal kepada teman, Lailah. Saya mungkin sedikit keluar dari praktek, tapi aku ingat itu.
"Itu menyengat sedikit. Aku tahu dia tidak bermaksud untuk menjadi keras. Ibu saya langsung, menuntut, dan mudah, tapi dia tidak pernah setan atau dendam. Kepribadiannya berasal dari keharusan. Saya tidak tahu banyak tentang masa lalunya, tapi aku tahu dia telah ditinggalkan oleh satu orang dia pikir bisa dia percaya-ayah. Saya tidak berpikir dia pernah melupakan itu. Sejak itu, dia berjuang untuk segala sesuatu dalam hidup, dan aku tahu penyakit saya hanya membuat yang sepuluh kali lebih keras. Dia menghabiskan nya peduli hidup bagi saya, jadi dia tidak pernah bisa fit dalam kehidupan cinta.
"Dan sekarang, kita lebih," aku hanya menjawab, tidak tahu persis apa yang harus menelepon Jude dan saya.
Pacar Kata lakukan baik suara , tapi ia tidak mengatakan hal itu, dan saya pasti tidak akan pergi sekitar menyebutnya bahwa tanpa bukti terdengar dari dia. Teman dengan manfaat hanya terdengar kotor, dan kita pasti tidak ada belum. Kilatan bibirnya di tambang sementara tangannya telah pindah bagian belakang kemeja menari di kepala saya, dan saya merasa pipiku memerah. Sementara saya berharap untuk lebih dari teman-teman, saya melihat ke depan untuk bagian manfaat.
Ibuku menggeleng frustrasi sebelum meninggalkan ruangan. Saya yakin ia akan menemukan Dr Marcus memiliki salah satu dari pertemuan rahasia bahwa saya tidak akan mengetahui rahasia. Kami tidak ingin bicara tentang kesehatan saya sendiri di depan saya.
Saya biarkan jengkel mencair, dan saya meringkuk kembali di tempat tidur, membiarkan pikiran saya melayang kembali ke Jude. Apapun label kami adalah teman-atau sesuatu yang lain-aku ingin terus meskipun aku tahu bahwa aku tidak seharusnya. Aku egois untuk tidak mendorong dia pergi. Hidup saya adalah di persimpangan jalan. Siapa tahu jalan mana yang saya akan berakhir perjalanan? Apakah itu adil untuk meminta dia untuk berjalan salah satu dari mereka jalan dengan saya? Bahkan jika saya cukup beruntung untuk mendapatkan transplantasi, tidak akan ada jaminan akan sukses.
Tapi ada pernah ada jaminan dalam hidup?
Aku bilang Jude bahwa saya percaya hidup normal adalah tentang baik dan buruk. Pasang surut, tidak tahu di mana hidup kita akhirnya akan berakhir-itulah yang membuat kita manusia.
Bukankah itu yang saya inginkan-hidup normal tanpa jaminan?
Jika Aku sudah hidup dari satu saat yang buruk ke yang berikutnya dengan sangat sedikit baik di tengah, bisa tidak saya hanya mengambil Jude sebagai wild card saya? Tidak bisa dia menjadi penyelamat saya dari semua yang buruk aku harus bertahan?
Tapi hubungan normal tentang memberi dan menerima.
Jika Yudas adalah pengganti saya untuk semua yang buruk dalam hidup saya, saya bisa menjadi miliknya?
Tapi bagaimana jika saya yang sebaliknya? Itu satu pertanyaan tunggal terus mengulangi melalui pikiran saya ketika saya mencoba untuk menangkap saat-saat tenang beberapa istirahat sebelum ibuku kembali. Aku melemparkan semua selimut dari saya dan kemudian segera menarik mereka kembali di sekitar saya beberapa menit kemudian ketika saya menjadi es dingin. Ketika aku menyerah pada gagasan tidur, aku bukan mengeluarkan laptop saya dan memasuki satu nama melakukan lap di kepala saya. Ribuan hasil pencarian muncul di Google. Banyak yang tidak secara khusus terkait dengan Jude melainkan keluarga secara keseluruhan. Saya menemukan laporan keuangan dan foto glamor dari yang saya diasumsikan berada orangtuanya di acara-acara amal dan pertemuan sosial elit lainnya. Saya menggulir ke bawah lebih lanjut dan menemukan sebuah artikel lama berjudul "The Cavanaughs Cari Tambang Emas di Son Bungsu." Melihat sekeliling ruangan, aku merasa seperti aku mengkhianati semacam kepercayaan rahasia antara Jude dan saya. Mengapa saya merasa perlu untuk melakukan hal ini? Tidak harus saya hanya meminta dia? Tapi jari saya didorong ke bawah pada touchpad, dan saya berhenti artikel. Saya dipindai teks, menarik keluar bit informasi yang saya temukan yang relevan, dan pikiran saya berhenti mendadak sekitar sepertiga dari jalan turun setelah pengenalan mana wartawan telah menulis tentang penghargaan yang luas dan prestasi dari keluarga Cavanaugh. Jude pintar, seperti benar-benar panik pintar. Dia juga telah dipersiapkan dari hampir bayi untuk mengambil alih bisnis keluarga. Menurut ini Artikel, setelah menunjukkan cinta untuk matematika pada usia dini, orang tuanya telah mengirimnya ke sekolah terbaik uang dapat membeli. Dari waktu dia masih TK, dia mengajari pribadi. Wartawan berkomentar bahwa uang telah terbuang karena semua tutor di dunia tidak bisa mengajarkan Jude satu hal yang ia miliki sejak lahir-insting. Dari usia tiga belas, daripada mengambil bagian dalam kegiatan setelah sekolah, Jude telah membantu ayahnya membuat keputusan bisnis utama. Sebuah ketukan di pintu saya kaget saya dari membaca saya, dan saya dengan cepat membanting laptop saya menutup malu. Rahmat melenggang melalui saya pintu seperti menghirup udara segar di musim gugur. "Selamat pagi, permen. Mendengar Anda memiliki malam yang kasar. Anda tidak mencoba untuk meninggalkan aku lagi, kan? "Tanyanya dengan mengedipkan mata." Ugh, sekarang tidak lagi. "Topeng di wajahnya menyembunyikan senyumnya dari saya, tapi saya bisa melihat berkerut di sekitar matanya, jadi saya tahu itu ada, terkubur di bawah yang meliputi pakai jelek. "Yah, tidak peduli. Kami akan membuat Anda keluar dari sini segera. "Tidak seperti kali di masa lalu, aku tidak ingin pulang. Aku masih ingin, terutama mengetahui saya masih akan melihat Jude, tapi ketika saya masih di sini, aku bisa melihat dia hampir setiap hari. Apakah itu kasus luar batas-batas rumah sakit? Atau akan berbeda? Aku punya begitu banyak pertanyaan yang belum terjawab. "Hei, Grace. Apakah Anda tahu apa-apa tentang keluarga Cavanaugh? "Tanyaku langsung." Seperti, keluarga Cavanaugh? "Dia pindah sekitar ruangan saat ia mulai memeriksa tanda-tanda vital dan menggantikan cairan saya." Ya, aku, um ... menonton berita yang hari dan sesuatu tentang mereka muncul, "aku berbohong. Itu adalah kebohongan putih, sehingga tidak masuk hitungan. "Nah, jika mereka tidak di film atau di acara TV, saya tidak membayar banyak perhatian, tapi aku tahu beberapa hal tentang anak." Hatiku dipercepat, tapi aku mencoba untuk tidak tampil sedikit pun terpengaruh. "Oh?" Tanya saya. "Ya, dia cantik-tidak cantik seperti Brian saya, tentu saja." Dia mengambil tempat duduk di tepi tempat tidur di samping kaki saya untuk menyelesaikan obrolan kami. "Saya pikir dia tidak terlihat dalam waktu yang lama, "aku menawarkan." Oh, bukan dia. Aku sedang berbicara tentang Roman Cavanaugh, yang tertua. Dia sudah di majalah gosip sejak ia masih di SMA. Dia salah satu dari orang-orang yang sulit untuk menjinakkan. Semua orang selalu ingin tahu siapa dia berkencan atau di mana ia terakhir terlihat. Dia seperti George Clooney dari dunia bisnis. "" Dan saudara lainnya? "Aku bertanya, menyesuaikan selimut saya sehingga saya tidak perlu melihat matanya." Oh, benar. Siapa namanya? Jude! Oh, hey, seperti Jude kami. Mereka jenis terlihat sama, kecuali kita memiliki semua tato dan otot. Saya tidak tahu dengan jujur. Dia benar-benar tidak pernah menjadi jauh dari tokoh masyarakat. Ini selalu Romawi. Pers berspekulasi bahwa Jude menjadi sangat introvert setelah tunangannya meninggal. "Tunangan? Meninggal?" Benarkah? "Aku parau keluar." Ya, keluarga tidak merilis banyak detail sampai bulan setelah fakta. Tidak ada yang bahkan tahu ia terlibat. Tentu saja, satu-satunya orang yang pernah Cavanaugh diperhatikan adalah Roman, "katanya dengan mata menerawang dan mengangkat bahu. Jude terlibat? Dan ia kehilangan dia? Aku merasa sakit dan kesedihan untuknya. Semua itu direbus seperti neraka sampai aku merasa pusing dari itu. Hatiku mulai irama menentu yang tidak ada hubungannya dengan pendidikan yang tiba-tiba saya Jude masa lalu. Rahmat bangkit dari tempat dia di ujung tempat tidur saya dan kembali rutinitasnya. Dia berbalik padaku saat ia terputus kantong cairan kosong dari berdiri IV. "Berbicara tentang Judes, apa yang terjadi dengan Anda dan Jude kami? Aku dengar dia cukup menimbulkan keributan di sekitar sini tadi malam. "Ruangan mulai berputar, dan manik-manik keringat menetes ke bawah dahi saya sementara saya mencoba untuk menyuarakan jawaban. Semua yang keluar adalah sekelompok suku kata yang tidak berguna. Kepala Grace tajam berbalik, dan aku melihat ekspresi terkejut nya melalui kabut gerakan sebelum ia mengulurkan tangan untuk meraih tombol panggilan saya. Saya mendengar dia berteriak kata-kata, "Kode Biru," tepat sebelum aku pingsan.