By the time Scout’s feet dragged th

By the time Scout’s feet dragged through the door of St. Christopher’s that night, her head was still out of sorts. Pearl had been stoned out of her mind and was barely able to speak when she arrived. Her mother rested naked on her makeshift pallet, not thinking clearly. After Scout had settled her a bit, she bathed her as best she could with the bottle of rainwater she’d collected, and cried.
Tracks from shooting up had disfigured her mother’s flesh permanently. Her eyes were unfocused and as Scout tended to her needs, her mother told her about her beautiful daughter, Evelyn, who hadn’t come to visit in a while. Some days she wondered why she didn’t just let her go and save herself the torture of watching her mother slowly kill herself.
By curfew Scout was nothing more than a rundown body needing a long night’s rest. Parker wasn’t waiting for her tonight. No, he’d already be inside eating. She’d missed supper. Luckily her belly was still full from the lunch Mr. Patras provided. Lucian Patras was an entire other issue her mind was too exhausted to think about.
Wearily, her feet trudged the church steps. When she reached the basement, the dining hall was empty. Sighing, she turned and headed back outside to the school.
“Hey.”
Scout started as Parker suddenly jumped in step beside her. “Hey,” she replied wearily.
“I thought you were coming here after work so we could visit Pearl together.”
Shit. She'd totally forgotten he'd said he'd go with her. Made no difference anyway. If Pearl couldn’t recognize her, her own daughter, she certainly wouldn’t have recognized Parker.
“I’m sorry, Parker. I totally forgot.”
“Hey.” He frowned and pulled her to the side of the hall. “What’s up? You look upset.”
Scout hadn’t realized how close to tears she was. “It’s nothing. She was just really bad today. She didn’t recognize me, and she was covered in her own filth. Probably some of someone else’s too. I couldn’t leave her that way.”
A jerky gasp filled her lungs and she pressed her lips tight, refusing to cry in front of him.
Parker looked at her, not with pity, but the true understanding of a friend. Without promising something he couldn’t guarantee, he did the only thing he could do to help. He pulled her into his arms and hugged her tight.
Scout leaned into his strong form and shut her eyes. Besides Pearl, Parker was the only person she ever let touch her, and even that was a rare occurrence. His arms wrapped around her and he whispered, “I’m sorry, Scout.”
Swiping at her insistent tears, glad no one else was around at the moment, she said, “It’s okay. It is what it is.”
His large, firm palm rubbed over her back. He smelled nice. Her nose breathed in the traces of soap clinging to his sweater. He must’ve washed it recently.
“She’s getting so thin. As I bathed her I could count her ribs. She doesn’t even have breasts anymore. I’m so afraid of the day I’ll go there and she . . .” A shaky breath cut off her fears.
“Shh, don’t talk like that. You’re a good daughter and your mother loves you. You’re doing everything you can to help her.”
Although Pearl was adamant about staying out of the shelters, with a little bit of money, Scout could maybe find a small place for her and Pearl alone. Her mother had been raped when she was in her thirties at a shelter, and since then had never entered another. If she could just get her away from the mill, away from the tracks and those assholes down there, maybe she could get a little better. Some days Scout saw signs of the old Pearl, but most days she was a realist enough to know her brain was too far damaged from drugs and hard living to ever return her mother to her.
Her mind switched to Lucian Patras and his offer. If she helped him, maybe he’d help her get help for Pearl. Maybe if she could afford a good doctor and could put her mother on some sort of medicine, she could get better. Pearl had to be less than ninety pounds at this point.
At the rate her mother was withering away, she didn’t have much time left. She was going to do what she was going to do. Every decision she made had a direct correlation to how she’d obtain her next fix. She’d sell herself to anyone to score a hit, and every time she did it brought her a little closer to death. Scout could sell herself just the same, but without the risks Pearl tempted with such dealings. Mr. Patras was worlds away from the men her mother dealt with.
Breathing in the last bit of Parker’s strength and familiar scent, Scout straightened her shoulders and pulled away. Enough self-pity.
“Thanks, buddy. I needed that. Don’t tell the others or I’ll have to retaliate just to prove I’m still a hard-ass.”
He smiled sadly and wiped away a tear her cold fingers had missed. “No one doubts your toughness, Scout. You’re one of the toughest girls I know.” He reached into his pocket. “Here, I saved you my roll from supper.”
Her heart swelled. Parker was an awesome friend. “Thank you, but you keep it. I already ate my fill today.”
There was no need to tell him. As much as she wanted to tell him about the amazing feast earlier, in the light of their existence it now only seemed cruel.
“You sure?”
His hunger was evident in the way he held the stale bread. She smiled. “Yeah, I’m sure.”
By the time they made it into the gymnasium, it was already lights out. Scout said good night to Parker and went to the ladies’ room. Sometimes it was nice to be the last one standing. She needed a good wash and having the restroom to herself made that a little more possible.